My Inner Home

Silently in my inner home, the pounding of my heart,

the chirping of a bird, the murmur of the wind whisking by my face,

pulling and pushing the thinned strands of my grey hair.

A symphony of sounds pierces my inner home, the sounds of cars, a high flying plane, and children playing in my neighbor’s yard.

I am seeking to silence my inner voice, quiet and forgetful.

My restless inner voice, recalling the remote past, the regrets, the mistakes,

and many lost opportunities.

 

I see their faces in my inner home, their laughs, their pain and sacrifices.

Sorry Mom, sorry Dad, I did not tell you I love you.

 

 

Advertisements

Goodbye

 

The hardest thing about saying goodbye is leaving friends behind.

The time and space we shared, as brief and small as it was, was a home away from the place we all call home.

We saw and shared good and bad memories, people we knew,

Tools we used, the space we called office,

a cage, a prison, an empty space, devoid of human soul.

 

How time, just a wink, passed between the hello and this goodbye.

We just met, but now I say goodbye.

The hardest emotion is to leave you behind.

Failure

I learn from my mistakes. A successful life is a continuum of losses followed by corrections, all along staying on the path to the desired objective.  Failure  could be a great teacher for succeeding if you would not repeat the same process again.

If you don’t take calculated risk, you will never succeed.

“Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose.” – Bill Gates

Sorry

My parents did not tell me anything about themselves or the family. They wrote: “Oh, everything is good and we are happy and well” I later found out they were not well, not everything was OK and my favorite aunt had died sometimes ago. I did the same thing to them. I never told them about my problems. We both lied to each other.

Was that OK? I wish I would have shared more of my life and they would have shared more of their life. I missed a great deal of life not knowing about them. I am sorry for not being closer to them; a 7000 miles was too far to arrange a monthly trip while going to school.

Calm Waters

One step, tentative, searching, going in,

Feeling happy and then sad;

Where to and why?

One step closer, or further away;

Don’t know!

Hoping my happiness shines my inner sadness.

Hoping my sadness tempers my confidence;

Slow, tentative, reaching closer to my wish,

Wish not to be lost forever.

Things familiar, but longtime forgotten.

Forces shaped in the past, Piercing my inner turbulence;

Yes, feeling happy now, but sad again!

Why? When

My inner desires searching for calm waters.

I search, tentative steps, hoping for inner peace.